Keeping focused

What the heck am I doing?  I let two days go by without doing my quota.  No pages on Friday or Sunday!  The month is going to be over before I’ve even gotten halfway through the first draft.
It’s hard when you keep looking at the big picture.  When you keep looking at how far you have to go.  To be honest, my daily output to get there is pretty ambitious, anyway.  Four pages a day.  It’s completely within my  ability to write that much, but it’s currently beyond my routine.
I feel like Sisyphus, looking at that damn rock that he has to push up the hill.  Forget the fact that it is going to roll back down, just as I reach the summit; it will be a hell of a lot of work just getting it up there.  But the struggle is part of the journey.  It’s part of how you get better as a writer.  It’s like a training run for a marathon runner or playing scales for a musician.  It must be done.
The temptation is to try and play catch up.  I missed writing eight pages, so I’ll write twelve pages today, instead of just four pages.  Or I’ll write five pages for the next eight days, instead of writing four.  But I will stick to the schedule and only focus on getting four pages done today.   Today is all that matters.  Let me be successful today.  I’ll worry about tomorrow’s pages, tomorrow.
As Samuel Bekett said, “Try again.  Fail again.  Fail better.”
Time to start writing.

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