I found out last night that I won’t be playing Vanya in Vanya and Sonia and Masha and Spike. At least not any time soon.

Not only did I not get the part — I didn’t even get a callback. Talk about adding insult to injury.

Oh well.

I’ll be honest. It stung.

It always stings when you don’t get a part that you imagine yourself playing.

But I’ve been on the other side of the audition process. Watching hopefuls audition and having to make the difficult decision of who to cast.

It’s not only whether an actor can perform the role. They also have to “fit” with the other actors that will be cast. And sometimes you have a vision for the part, that someone doesn’t fit.

It sucks. But that’s life.

Disappointment weighed me down last night. Like, “I’m going to order an extra-large pizza and 2lbs of wings and eat it all” kind of disappointment. I put on a brave face for Deb, but I was sad.

I was still bummed out this morning.

But…

Them’s the breaks. You can’t get all the roles that you want to play. You can’t get everything you want.

I’ve been very lucky on getting cast in a lot of shows. And I never expect to get cast. I hope for it… A lot! But I never expect it.

And even though it hurt not to get the part, it means that there’s room in my life for something better to come along. It’s happened many times before.

The sting is gone. I wish the best for the show, and everyone involved. It’s a fun play!

Now, I need to see what opportunity is going to come my way instead of that role…