Last week was our first time being off book for The Game’s Afoot.  Fran, our director was lenient with us. Because we were actually supposed to be off book the previous rehearsal.

No one likes these first rehearsals “off book”.

Without our scripts.

The transition from script to memory is always painful.

The lines you think you know, suddenly disappear.

Your cue comes up but only a blank space appears in your memory.

Or you know the gist of the line, but not the specific wording.

Your fellow actors are waiting for the specific words you’re supposed to say. Because their response depends on them.

Fun?

No!

It’s uncomfortable.

It’s painful.

And it’s necessary. 

The script becomes a Band-Aid that must be ripped off.  So that the performances can be fine tuned.

I expect pain at this week’s rehearsals, too.

But less than last week.

There are still a couple of problem spots in my lines.

They need to be run some more times.

Practice, practice, practice.

It’s difficult making the time to practice. 

But it has to be done.

It’s at this point that it feels like everything is revolving around rehearsals.

It’s a big hump that everyone in the cast needs to get over.

And it’s a team effort.

The worst part of it is that you can get self-conscious or down on yourself.

You feel that you’ve let down your fellow actors.

It’s a yucky feeling.

But you have to suck it up and go through with it.

It makes me spend more time on my lines. 

It also helps to remember that not knowing your lines doesn’t only affect you.

It affects the whole cast.

The whole production.

Instead of feeling bad, I work on my lines.

And not knowing them perfectly is part of the process.

It’s part of learning any skill.  You mess up.

I try not to take it to heart.  I get back to work.

And I know that each rehearsal, we’ll all get better and better.