I used to say that I learned empathy from my mother and compassion from my father.

But I’m not sure that I am compassionate. Sorry, Dad. He was very compassionate.

Or is it that I became less compassionate over time?

I’m more empathetic than compassionate.

What does that mean?

Empathy is the ability to sense other’s emotions. To see things from their point of view. Or to imagine yourself in their place.

My writing and acting help with that skill.

Compassion is recognizing the suffering in someone else and wanting to something about it.

Compassion is more about taking action and helping. Or wanting to.

If I can empathize with someone, I’m more likely to feel compassion for their situation.

Compassion isn’t a default response of mine, however. I tend to be a bit judgey.

My wife and kids are much more compassionate than I am.

They constantly remind me to be less judgmental.

Compassion is supposed to be good for you. It can help you live longer. Improve your relationships. And it feels good.

I guess recognizing my compassion deficiency is part of the solution.

Being patient is a way to develop compassion. So is encouraging others. Expressing gratitude and appreciation. Forgiving people.

And the biggie: being less judgmental.

Ouch.

That’s a hard one for me.

I can start with trying to be more patient and listening without judgment.

And maybe have a little more compassion for myself, too.