Yesterday I mentioned the Noah Kagen exercise about “asking” for 10% rebate on your coffee.

And I’ve been thinking about it. Not the exercise. The process of asking for something.

The thought of asking for something scares the beejeezus out of me.

It’s the fear of rejection. The fear of getting a “no.”

But if you don’t ask, you won’t get a “yes”, either.

You’ve got to be vulnerable.

But dang. It scares me so much.

My son has never been afraid to ask for what he wants.

When he was four or five, we were picking up a family meal at KFC. Keaton asked the server if he could have one of the happy meal toys. The one’s you get when you order a children’s meal.

But we weren’t getting a children’s meal.

The server said, “Sure.”

I stammered, “But we’re not buying one of the kid’s meals.”

“That’s okay,” said the server. And he gave my son the toy.

About fifteen years later, we were at Pizza Pizza. (Yes, we ate a lot of fast food…)

We were picking up some pizzas for the family. And my son ordered the walk in special. Which was a small pepperoni pizza, no substitutions.

My son ordered the special but asked if he could have bacon instead of pepperoni. The owner said, “Sure.” And walked away to prepare the pizza.

My son turned to me, wide-eyed. He whispered, “That’s the first time I’ve ever gotten a yes when I asked for that.”

Apparently, he would frequently ask to substitute ingredients when there were “no substitutions”.

And he often got a no.

But that didn’t stop him from asking.

I marvel at his skill. Asking for what you want. And not being downtrodden if you get a no. But also, being able to ask again and again.

Maybe I should stop worrying about the answer? And get better at asking the questions.