I read a fair number of books. Mostly non-fiction.

Often, it feels like I’m consuming them like a bag of chips. I enjoy them in the moment, but I don’t remember much after I’ve read the book.

I’m trying to get into the habit of finding at least one thing that I get from the book. One lesson. One idea.

Recently, I finished reading Scarcity Brain by Michael Easter. It’s a fascinating book that explores why we crave things and keep wanting more.

But my main takeaway from that book was a simple sentence. A hack to get yourself out of a loop.

Easter recounts having a fight with his wife. And they were both angry with each other. Neither one wanted to give in. Each one insisted that they were “right”.

Later, he told his friend about the fight. And expected his friend to side with him.

Instead, his friend said, “Would you rather be right or be happy?”

Most arguments aren’t about important things. Will it be important a year from now? Five years from now?

We can bluster about how we’re right. And feel so darn smug. And superior.

It creates animosity. This need to prove that my opinion is the correct one.

But would I rather be right or be happy?

For the silly, unimportant things it makes sense to use this sentence as a filter.

Because many of us treat EVERYTHING as life and death situations. When it’s only a matter of your opinion vs my opinion.

I found myself using it at work.

I often feel the need to prove I’m right and the other person is “wrong”. But the sentence popped into my head. I took a breath and let it go.

Proving the other person wrong wasn’t going to enhance the interaction between us. It would make it unpleasant. And lengthen it.

Because then they’re going to want to show how they are “right” and I’m wrong.

Would you rather be right or be happy?

Sometimes, you might want to be right. But most times, you want to be happy.